I have learned three truths as an adult that has saved my sanity.
First, you cannot heal another person. Unless that person wants to change their life, you can do nothing or say that will make a difference. You can offer your suggestions and then let them go. If a person wants to change, they may see value in your advice. If not, you have offered your insights, and that is all you can do.
Second. Life is much like flying on an airline. When the oxygen masks fall from the ceiling, put yours on first. If you pass out, you cannot help anyone else. If you put your mask on first, then you can help anyone, including your family, sitting around you. In life take time for self-care. If you do not practice self-care, you will not be able to care for anyone else.
Third. We are all wounded. We all travel through life as wounded beings. Sometimes our wounds overcome us. Most times, we can cope. Society tells us we have to show the world that we have our shit together and then cry in our bathroom when no one is looking. We do not have to walk in pain alone.
There is always someone who understands your woundedness because they have been there and have the tee-shirt. If that person has not shown up in your life, remain open because one day he or she will. Please do not force it. Let the Universe you need help and keep yourself open to what may come.
Peace to you and yours!